In November of the fifth year of the Longqing reign, Emperor Huai Zexin fell seriously ill and was in a coma. The doctors were helpless and feared that he would not live long.
Later, I was sent to Tianlao for the crime of regicide. The punishment was nothing. In this place that I was very familiar with, I could tell the origin of each torture instrument, and no one knew their use better than me.
Finally, when even the silver needles on my fingertips could no longer force me to cry, you came, your dark clothes against your pale face. Chu Zeyun, you are not the one whose nails are pierced by silver needles, why are you so haggard?
"I told you to take good care of him."
Yes, you said so. The general who went to war left his life and property behind, but entrusted his most important thing to me. I am so lucky.
"The doctor said it was poisoning."
The imperial physician said this before you came back. Unfortunately, there is no cure.
"I know it wasn't you."
Chu Zeyun, you finally said something sensible. Unfortunately, I was the only one beside Zexin before he fainted. Even if you have the ability to defy the heavens, you can't stop the people from talking. They have been looking forward to tearing me into pieces.
"save him."
"I'm not a deity."
I blinked, and the shadow on the wall remained motionless. You came to hug me across the wooden fence, and except for intercourse, we hadn't been so close for a long time.
"Then go find the gods."
You stayed by his bedside without taking off your clothes, but you couldn't make him sober, so you pinned your hopes on the illusory legend. Chu Zeyun, Chu Zeyun, you really loved him so much.
You said: "Sang Mo, I only trust you."
Yes, yes, yes, you said so before you went to the battle. You only trust me. Even if the sky collapses, the earth cracks, the sea dries up, the rocks crumble, and all the people and gods perish, you still have to believe in me. Chu Zeyun, you must remember that Sang Mo is your last resort.
Time seems to have gone back to eighteen years ago, when you applied medicine to me, whispered to me face to face, and played with me. When I rode on my horse and left the capital, you waved to me from the city wall, and I smiled until my cheeks were stiff. When I looked back, there was no one behind me. What a reality!
I'll go find the legendary old immortal for you. His Taoist temple is on a high mountain. It was already the twelfth lunar month, and the snow and wind seemed to want to blow me off the mountainside. After climbing for a long time, I finally got a little closer to the top of the mountain, but my foot slipped and all my efforts were wasted. A rouge-red porcelain bottle was broken in my bag, and I looked miserable.
The old immortal was quite leisurely, sitting cross-legged on a cushion, his long white eyebrows drooping to his knees. Without opening his eyes, he noticed me soaked by the snow outside. I spread my bag in front of him, and the room was filled with jewels and gems. He still didn't open his eyes, and calmly recited his scriptures. I waited, sitting cross-legged opposite him in my wet cotton coat, drowsy to the sound of his scriptures.
"What do you want?"
"Everything has its own destiny. It cannot be forced." He finally spoke, and the wisps of incense surrounded his body, adding a bit of fairy air.
"I understand this principle, but my master doesn't, National Master." National Master, if you can save Chu Zexin, you will be the national master of the Chu family world, and the people will be taught by you. Don't doubt it, Chu Zeyun has always been generous.
He shook his eyebrows and began to recite a passage of scripture that I couldn't understand. I was bored and saw a emerald green butterfly fly in from the window in this cold season.
"It's not that I don't want to save you, but the law of nature has its own destiny, and we must not go against it."
"If you have any request, please speak up."
He sighed, and I saw the flickering light in his eyes: "Everything has a price, let alone human life?"
"What is the price of human life?"
"One life for one life."
I see.
I looked at the two small wine glasses that the little Taoist boy brought to me. One of them was wine, and the other was poisoned. If I chose the poisoned one, I would lose my life here. If I chose the wine one, it would be a great blessing for Chu Zexin, and I would take the antidote down the mountain.
The emerald green butterfly fluttered in the room and suddenly landed on one of the small wine glasses.
"Your Majesty, if you get the antidote, will you be cured?"
He nodded.
"Just this once?"
He stroked his long eyebrows slyly: "Three times."
No wonder. It turns out that I have to run two more times. Human life really has a high price.
Then I chose the wine glass that the green butterfly had stopped at, and drank it all in one gulp. A hint of spiciness rolled over my tongue, it was the wine. I felt relieved. The little boy brought a small jade-colored bottle.
"Dissolve the powder in water and give it to the patient." He finally opened his eyes, his cloudy eyes still gleaming with brilliance. "I'll be expecting you in a month."
Chu Zeyun, Sang Mo never let you down. I braved the snow and returned to the palace. From afar, I saw your black figure walking quickly. I got off the horse, and my knees went weak and I sank into the thick snow. I heard a low cheer in the room. From beginning to end, I was looking for your dark eyes, but you only left me with a swift back. No one came to pay attention to me. I built a small snowman in front of me, wrote the word Chu on his body with my fingertips, and then poked, poked, poked, poked a hole in his heart.
It snowed heavily that year, from December to the following year. I went to look for the old immortal for the second time. When I got on my horse and left the capital, there was no one behind me. It was still the green butterfly that guided me to risk my life to fight for the antidote. I didn't tell anyone, especially you, Chu Zeyun. I knelt in the snow outside the palace for the second time. This time, you finally remembered me outside the door. I stood up when you were about to step over the threshold, patted the snow on my knees, and left you with my back. When I turned around, I saw your frozen face and felt very happy.
The third time was also the last time. On the eve of my departure, you finally stopped being gentle and pressed me down until dawn. I could hardly breathe and told you intermittently, "When I come back, your Ze Xin will be completely well." When I fell asleep, I heard someone whisper in my ear, "Let's start over." I struggled to open my eyes, but you were asleep.
You actually came to see me off like you did the first time, and you said to me, "Sang Mo, I only trust you." You waved to me from the tower, and I smiled, my cheeks almost stiffened. I was thinking about the words that seemed to be hallucinations last night, and then I looked back and saw Xiaorou standing beside you, my sister...it turns out you knew everything.
It was Xiaorou who did it. Jealousy and hatred distorted my innocent and kind sister. She was still young and should not have cut off her long black hair and spent her life in the morning and evening bells. She should have been the queen mother, but Chu Zeyun and Chu Zexin took her position. The same loneliness brought her together with the disgraced Concub!ne Hua. The two women, who were also suffering from jealousy, conspired to do this in front of the solemn and compassionate Buddha statue. Xiaorou went to find a strange poison, which was brought into the palace by Concub!ne Hua and then poured into Zexin's ginseng soup.
I went to look for him, and Xiaorou cried and shouted at me: "I hate Chu Zeyun, I hate Chu Zexin, I hate you!"
I know, I know, I know. So I will never betray you. Even if you are no longer my beautiful and lovely sister, I am still your brother.
Chu Zeyun, no wonder you asked me to find the antidote. I said nothing, you were angry, but you couldn't do anything. I helped Xiaorou destroy all the evidence, you couldn't punish her openly. Chu Zeyun, I am the one who knows you best, and I am also the one who makes you feel helpless. Don't deny it, I saw the frustration on your face in prison that day. You can't do anything to me, you can only let me make up for your crime.
You brought Xiaorou with you to remind me, right? If I can't save your Zexin, you'll break up with me. You were too reckless, and it's not like your method. You probably didn't even realize that you no longer trust me. We have come to the point where we have to rely on threats. Thinking back to the years in the cold palace, it's really ironic.
This time, I decided to choose for myself. The emerald green butterfly landed on the wine glass on the left. I reached out and picked up the glass on the right. The clear liquid reflected my eyes.
The taste of the poisoned wine was not special, it burned from the tip of my tongue to the bottom of my heart like a burning knife. I pressed myself tightly to the ground, trying to melt the snow beneath me, the sun stung my eyes. I heard my heavy breathing, and vaguely saw a pair of dark eyes through my fingers. I knew it was an illusion. It turns out that the person I want to see most when I am dying is still you, Chu Zeyun. I can't save your Zexin, I started to plan this when I was in the prison, and every time you get what you want, the game loses suspense.
Sang Mo never disappoints you, but you always disappoint me. Chu Zeyun, I am tired of seeing your gentle or ruthless face, and I am tired of the mutual torture and hypocrisy that seem to be entangled with you forever. Once the game becomes boring, people lose the patience to continue. Let's play it one last time. You have Xiaorou in your hand, and I have Zexin in my hand. You always remember the me in the cold palace who always cares about you, but you forget that under your promotion, I have become "Lord Sang" in the mouths of the ministers, with a heart of stone and no conscience. So, this time, I won.
Chu Zeyun, I am looking forward to your expression when you receive the news of my death, surprise or disappointment, it doesn't matter, I never expect you to feel heartbroken for me. You should save your tears for Chu Zexin's funeral hall. I don't want your tears, I just want your face that shows regret, even if it's fleeting, even if it's for losing Zexin, even if you feel you trusted me wrongly. I just want you to regret.
Chu Zeyun, I'm waiting for you at the Naihe Bridge. I'll give you one last chance. Don't let me down again.
"I'm such a loser." The past was so far away. If you don't pay attention, the fleeting glimpse will slip through your fingers. Sang Mo reached out to touch the man's face for the last time. The man remained silent. In his black pupils, there was a ghost with a hint of self-mockery. "Forget it, if you can't see it, then don't see it. In fact, even I don't know what I'm struggling with... Rather than hating you, I hate myself..."
Suddenly, the ghost stopped talking, and his gray eyes widened incredulously. He trembled and took back his hand, and as if afraid of destroying something, he carefully touched the corner of the man's eye. His fingertips were wet, it was the man's tears, he was crying, I sat in the depths of the underworld, the loveless and desireless Lord of the Underworld, and I cried. His expression was no longer gloomy, no longer compassionate, on a blank face, a line of tears slowly slid down along the ghost's fingers, the man held Sang Mo's face with his bloody hands: "Why do you always abandon me first?"
His chest hurt a lot. The place where the ghost had cut him was bleeding. It flowed onto the ink-colored clothes, creating dark patterns that slowly spread and intertwined with the rolling cloud patterns on the collar. The golden hairpin inserted into the ghost's chest was dazzling. The ancient divine weapon Xingtian was showing off its brilliance wantonly, and the murderous aura was almost reaching the sky.
"You always refuse to tell me your love and hate, but you repeatedly teach me what loss is..." Kong Hua muttered to himself. Suddenly, he found that the beautiful ghost was about to disappear, and he could not find her even if he exhausted all his power in the underworld. In the future, in his long and endless future, on the other side of the endless river of Forgetfulness, there will be millions of dead souls, but there will be no such mean and poisonous beautiful ghost. He will never see her again, for hundreds of years, thousands of years, ten thousand years... Once lost, it can never be retrieved. His heart was hollowed out, and he could even hear a hollow echo when his fingers touched it. The inexplicable dull pain continued, and his heart without love and desire hurt as if it was torn apart. It was very uncomfortable, and he was almost out of breath. The feeling in his hands, feet and limbs was numb, and only the cold touch on his face was unusually clear.
Again and again, in a similar house, with similar pain and similar mood, he seemed to be abandoned by the whole world, and was left alone in a dead corner. He was so sad that he could not help himself. Something took the opportunity to break through the seal, and came overwhelmingly with the yellow color of a book page, as if to bury him. He felt dizzy and his empty heart was filled with joy and sadness in an instant. Joy, anger, sorrow and anger were emotions he had never experienced before, but they felt familiar. Laughter, crying, roaring...all kinds of sounds filled his ears, and he could not distinguish anything. His mind was about to explode...With a loud "bang", the huge door with vermilion lacquer rivets was blown open by the strong wind. The world suddenly became quiet, and he saw the small figure outside the threshold. He had a pair of black and white eyes, with the corners of his eyes slightly raised, timid but stubborn, and deep loneliness in his eyes, just like himself. Sang Mo. That was the first time I met Sang Mo.
I remember it, as Chu Zeyun’s memory.
"Sang Mo, I remember you." I once said that I want to remember you, so that I can accompany you for a long time. Kong Hua smiled slightly, with tears on his cheeks. The hand that was caressing Sang Mo's cheek slowly slid down and grasped the golden hairpin inserted in his chest. Xing Tian's murderous aura cut his finger, and the blood of the two mixed together.
"Last time, it was my negligence that allowed you to win by luck." He lowered his head and whispered intimately in Sang Mo's ear, as if he was saying the most gentle love words in the world, "But this time... Absolutely! Not!"
His tone suddenly rose, his eyebrows stood upside down, his wrist lifted, and he pulled the golden hairpin out of Sang Mo's body. Blood flowers flew, a few fireflies flashed, and the three souls and six spirits flew into the distance along with the blood beads. The night crows outside the house screamed and followed with flapping wings.
As the soul left, Sang Mo's body suddenly lost its life, only his eyes were still open in surprise, as if he still couldn't believe it.
Kong Hua put Xing Tian into his sleeves, holding him and slowly standing up. It was already dark outside, with a crescent moon hanging obliquely in the sky. The night on earth was peaceful and quiet: "Sang Mo, let's gamble again. I'll bet everything I have on your love and hate."
The black figure led a small child and walked away, blending into the deep night. Red slender petals fell from the sky, burying everything in the Jin Palace. With a sound of "Ya---", the old wooden door in the dilapidated house closed automatically, closing a room of bizarre legends.
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