I Can Spend Lives Waiting for You Chapter 6

31

In half a month, the first year of college is coming to an end.

After lights out, calling her is still meaningless chat.

Said "Bye", put down the phone and climbed into bed.

The dormitory was silent. It was almost one o'clock in the morning when my husband suddenly got up, sat down and lit a cigarette.

Looking at his back and the flickering cigarette B*tts through the mosquito net, tears flowed out so silently, I didn't dare to speak out, I just choked back and forth, feeling aggrieved and sad.

The next day, I broke up with her.

32

After my sophomore year, we no longer had classes together, and the opportunities to see each other were greatly reduced. Occasionally, we met in the cafeteria and chatted for a few words, but the "I'm sorry" I couldn't say out loud.

She often changed boyfriends, and her classmates said she was stimulated by me. I'm afraid that this is really the case, but I can't help but laugh at myself for being so sentimental.

I saw her again when I was about to graduate. I had already found a job in Guangdong, helping her set up a stall to sell old things and pack and ship them, as if to make up for it.

My husband said that our relationship was not over, and I glared at him, thinking it was not all because of you.

Moreover, it took me three years to get jealous. It took so long that I couldn’t wait any longer.

33

Yesterday, I suddenly remembered the word "widow". Women who lost their husbands called themselves this in ancient times, but no one calls them that now.

The three words on the side of the haiku are very touching, as if there are infinite stories in them.

I'm just not dead yet!

34

As a sophomore, a rookie has become a veteran, and he can more or less turn a blind eye to the school's rules. I rented a small room outside, with a bed, a desk, and a computer. I didn't go back to the dormitory for up to three months because I didn't want to see him.

The habit of turning day and night was formed at that time. I had nowhere to vent my longing and sorrow. I would often keep my eyes open until dawn, listening to the raindrops hitting the eaves outside, thinking about how I ended up in this situation. .

The more I miss you, the more I want to see you. The more I want to see him, the less he dares.

35

Winter in Changsha is humid and cold, with either dark clouds or rain.

I skipped class and sneaked back to the dormitory like a thief. I sat alone in the empty dormitory in a daze, not knowing what to do.

Someone knocked on the door, and it turned out to be him. Because of this unexpected encounter, both of them were startled.

Dare to walk up behind him, put his arms around his waist, buried his face on his back, and said, "I really want to kill you, and then cut off your head and make it a specimen. This way, I can take it with me wherever I go."

My husband opened my hand and walked out.

36

In the next six months, various illnesses came one after another, including insomnia, severe colds, allergies, and stomachaches. I refused to go to the hospital.

The times I missed him began to decrease, and most of the time I spent lingering on the bed with various illnesses, making me feel groggy. The cold didn't get better in a month, but after a while, allergies started again, accompanied by stomachache. The pain was so painful that I couldn't sleep. I got up in the middle of the night and sat around, taking a lot of painkillers, which had a sleeping effect.

My weight plummeted, and my height of 177 was less than 60 kilograms.

My classmates were frightened by my behavior that was close to self-abuse and abandonment. Seven people took turns taking care of me, watching me take medicine, and took me to the hospital.

I can do anything.

37

Once I woke up, my husband was sitting by the bed with a gloomy look on his face, and the two of them were relatively speechless.

My husband asked: "Are you looking for death?"

You also know how to laugh, "If you are living well, why would you want to die!"

My husband was annoyed and said viciously: "You are just looking for death. You don't go to the hospital when you are sick, you take medicine randomly, and no one in the house knows when you die. Pervert."

At that time, what I was most afraid of hearing was the word "pervert", because I thought that maybe I really was one.

Hearing what he said, I felt so angry that my whole body was numb and my hands and feet were cold. Am I a pervert? It was you who recruited me to become a pervert. Picking up things on the bed and throwing them around, "I'm a pervert, stay away if you don't want to, get out!" There are too many words stuck in my heart, but I can't say them out. I like this person, and he treats everyone else well, even if it makes trouble I found myself in this situation today. Who can I blame?